Sunday, April 17, 2011
There's no one in the world who knows me the way you do. I'm not sure if it's the same for all siblings but with just eighteen months between us, I literally can't remember life without you. You know my secrets and my fears. My insecurities and my vices. We shared a room and a childhood, friends and many life experiences. You are my best friend and one of the kindest people I know. You are beautiful inside and out. And on Friday you're marrying your soul mate. I anticipate this day will be one of the happiest of my life. I can not wait.
Monday, April 11, 2011
These words spoke so strongly to me today:
I feel like I have a big basket full of gold coins and I'm walking down the street with the sun shining. I love my basket of coins, and I love the sun. There's a cool breeze and I'm by the ocean. Exactly where I want to be. But it's so full that they keep falling out and I stop every three seconds to pick one up. If I didn't know any better, I'd think they were flopping out on purpose, just to bug me. I can't keep up. So I am never- another one fell - doing - another one fell - enough - another one fell. My basket of coins, it's all I have, it's everything to me, it's a gift beyond my own ability to fully recognize. Hard to manage, yes, worth it, yes, easy? No.
The analogy was so beautifully spot on that it filled my soul with with sweet relief. Yes! That is me! I am that woman! Forever dropping coins! They're so beautiful yes, but can't they just stay in that damn basket for more than a few seconds at a time???
These boys, these beautiful, wonderful, demanding, all-consuming boys, they need me right now. So much so that in order to do it well, everything else suffers. And I'm constantly struggling to remember that this is alright. They are my greatest treasure, exhausting and insufferable at times, but always worthwhile.