There was a moment today in the living room. You were kneeling on the floor, fiddling with one of your little books. And the Dragon Tales theme song began playing on the TV. You immediately began bobbing your little head back and forth, doing your dance as you continued to play with your book. And in that moment I was so full. And my eyes stung a little from the tears and my heart filled up my chest. Because you are my kid and you are funny and wonderful and beautiful and I am so in love with you, it aches sometimes.
Hi I’m Ali and I’m kind of a TV junkie. I wasn’t always like this. But since being home all day with the kido it seems we’ve always got the boob tube going in the background. Especially when Grace is here. It's makes me feel less lonely while the two of them play. And today I was thinking I should probably tell you all about some of my televisual observations since I haven’t written a real blog post in a while.
First, of course, is The Price Is Right. It’s always a crowd pleaser, even among the babies. I wasn’t always a fan. Watching Bob Barker cringe every time an overly exuberant fan scrambled up on stage became a bit too painful for me. It wasn’t that he was a bad host. It’s just that really frail, old men should not be made to present glorious prizes to large, hyperventilating black ladies who may or may not break his hip in an effort to convey their excitement. Drew Carey is the reason I came back to the Price Is Right. He’s one of those people you see on TV and wonder what it would be like chat him up at a BBQ. He’s also rather (ahem) “sizeable” and has no need to protect himself from lively contestants. In fact he’s usually jumping up and down with them!
Another winner is of course Ellen. How can you not smile when watching this lady work her magic? She’s hilarious, for one thing. And she dances! It’s one of my life goals to be in her audience and rock out with her black, English DJ. Ellen just makes me feel gay. And not like in the attracted to girls sort of way. But like old people mean it when they talk about their youth and then we stifle a giggle because HA HA! YOU SAID YOU WERE GAY!! But seriously, it still throws me for a loop every time she talks about her wife, Portia De Larossi. Everytime I do one of those double takes like the coyote chasing the road runner. It’s not that I hate lesbians or anything. It’s just that I don’t know any very well personally (at least none that aren’t in the closet). And I especially don’t know any married ones. I think I met a couple last summer when I was buying flowers at Walmart but that’s another story for another day. Lets just say Birkinstocks. And armpit hair. Lots of armpit hair.
And have you seen that Lagoon commercial with the catchy little song and hot girls in bathing suits drinking Cokes? Every time that commercial comes on BOTH babies just stop whatever it is their doing and STARE. I don’t know what it is about that commercial. The music? The visuals? Whatever it is it’s entrancing. And as soon and it’s over they snap out of it immediately. The only other thing that catches their attention that much is Baby Einstein.
Well I'm off to do some surfing now. CHANNEL SURFING THAT IS!!