Friday, October 17, 2008

So I'm a real life parent now

Before I had FB I would hear new parents talk about how they were nervous about SIDS. I always thought I would never waste my energy worrying about something with such a mathematical improbability. But the truth is that now I don't even let myself explore the statistical possibility of SIDS. Because any chance is too big of a chance when it comes to my baby. I listen to his breathing until I fall asleep. And if he gets too quiet I sneak out of my bed to his cradle and put my hand on his chest so I can feel it rise and fall. Even when he wakes up in the middle of the night and wines until I rock him back to sleep I am just so happy he's healthy enough to alert me to his needs... okay, okay, I don't really think this at 1:30 AM but I do when he's not depriving me of sleep.

So many things change when you have kids. But I think the biggest change for me has been how little I worry about myself. I just worry about the kid instead.

love, ali

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